"I know we just met, but will you marinade me?"

I have a confession.

I've been vegetarian for about a year now, which is all fine and dandy (it's a lot easier in NY. Vegetarian in Alaska means you only eat fish).

But sometimes I really really miss steak.
There is nothing in vegetarian land that stands up to a juicy rib eye (still mooing, if possible).

But that doesn't stop me from trying to find one.
Hence....

Cauliflower steaks with olive relish and tomato sauce (Adapted from Bon App)
Serves 4

1 large head of cauliflower- trimmed, cored, leaves removed etc.
1/2 c black olives, diced
3 sundried tomatoes- slices
3 1/2 Tbsp olive oil
2 Tbsp parsley- chopped
Salt
Pepper
3 garlic cloves
2 plum tomatoes- cored and quartered


-Slice cauliflower into 4 1/2" "steaks." There will be loose ends that fall apart. Save these, finely chop them and put in a bowl.
-In said bowl, throw in the olives, sundried tomatoes, 1 Tbsp oil, parsley and lemon juice. Mix, season the relish with salt and pepper.
-Preheat oven to 400. Heat 1 Tbsp oil in a large skillet over medium high heat. Working in 2 batches, cook the cauliflower steaks until golden brown, about 2 mins per side. Add 1 Tbsp oil between the batches. Transfer steaks to a large rimmed baking sheet, roast the cauliflower until tender, about 15 mins
-Return the skillet to medium high heat, add garlic cloves and tomatoes (cut side down). Cook until tomatoes are browned, transfer to the baking sheet in the oven (can place them on top of the cauliflower) and roast until tender, about 12 mins.
-Transfer garlic, tomatoes and 1/2 Tbsp oil to a blender. Blend until smooth.
-Put cauliflower steak on a plate, put relish and sauce on top. Pretend it's a cow.

All you young'uns talk about something called THE HUNGER GAMES.
I've been able to glean that it's about kids killing each other.
Because that's what we want our youth growing up with.

The soundtrack though....
It's futuristic Appalachian music. And that is the best description of my musical leanings I've ever heard.

Carolina Chocolate Drops, Neko Case, The Decemberists... it's almost too good to be true.
Almost is the key word, it also features work by:
Taylor Swift
Kid Cudi
Maroon 5 (yeah...they're still around).

So touche Hunger Games. I really can't make up my mind about you.

ALSO!
Guess who has two thumbs, speaks limited French and is going to see ANDREW BIRD next week!

THIS MOI.