That time I stole tofu scramble

I worked at an unnamed vegan/vegetarian cafe in NYC for a grand total of 2 weeks and in that time I managed to wreck havoc on the West Village coffee drinkers. 

I'm not the best barista. 

I just really don't care about how you take your coffee, because I'm trying my hardest to not burn the shit out of my hand on the steam wand. 

Did I accidentally brush your scone with my un-gloved hand? Oops. 

And my latte art looked like someone took a very circular poo. 

Long story short, baristing wasn't my calling. 

But said vegan/vegetarian cafe had a awesome tofu scramble recipe. 

A recipe that I might have stolen. 

Tofu Scramble (from an unnamed source)

You'll need:

2 14 oz blocks of extra-firm tofu

2 tbsp vegetable oil

1 small onion- chopped

1 small green pepper- chopped

1 small red pepper- chopped

1/2 tsp ground coriander

1/2 tsp ground cumin

1 1/2 tsp ground tumeric

15 oz can black beans

1/4 c cilantro- chopped

Salt and pepper

4-6 tortillas (or how many scrambles you want to eat...)

Things to put on top: salsa, avocado, cheese, green peppers, hot sauce, sour cream... the options are limitless. 

You'll need to:

- Press the tofu. 

- Smash the tofu with a fork. 

- Heat oil in a large pan over medium heat. Add onions and peppers; cook until soft, about 3-4 minutes. Stir in coriander and cumin; cook with fragrant, about a minute. Throw in the tofu, tumeric and beans. Cook until heated through, about 2 minutes, stir in cilantro and season with salt and pepper. 

-Serve with tortillas and garnishes. 

I can never show my face in that cafe again. 

Guys, I have to talk about the new David Bowie album. 

I seriously love me some Bowie, so much so that I dressed up as him for Halloween. It was awesome. 

This album though? I get it, he's on a very slow roll. He's David Bowie and can do no wrong, but The Next Day really just makes me miss his cutting edge days, when he was trying his hardest to push boundaries. This album feels like his silent surrender into aging rocker-dom, a genre I refuse to place Bowie in. I like that his music is aging with him and he's not trying to squeeze his 66 year old body into skin tight leather suits anymore, but this album sent me into a 70s Bowie phase and that's a land I'd like to stay in. 

In the video for "The Stars Are Out Tonight" he wears a yellow Mr. Rogers cardigan. 

Bowie in a cardigan!?! I just... I can't...


On a completely unrelated note, KDP is now two years old and has 100 posts!
Thanks for reading.
(seriously, thanks).